The key to a social media detox is to let things fade and to care less.
This time of year I like to pull back and hibernate in a way. A social media detox is a big part of that.
Taking cues from nature, I let things slowly die off. Leaves fall away and so do select hobbies and people. This practice is pointed and seasonal so I can have space to reflect and think.
The goal is to turn inward for a time.
Assess, review, and make notes for next year. It’s also a time for reconnecting with my core community. My family.
I am on my phone less when I’m off social media and my text docket has been paired down to nearly zero.
This year, I did a 30-day social media detox that ended right before Thanksgiving. I have notes.
Social Media Statistics
First, some groundwork.
According to Exploding Topics, people spend an average of 3 hours and 15 minutes on their phones a day. This is honestly lower than I expected.
In terms of social media usage, individuals from across every generation feel they spend too much time on their phones and many are making an effort to cut back, as shown in the graph below.
This is not shocking news. I recently read The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry, which had a large section dedicated to citing social media and smartphone usage statistics.
Somehow these statistics always get me. Time is life. We don’t get it back. Looking at these types of statistics makes it easy to confront an addiction to social media and in-general phone usage.
Easy may not be the right term here. Maybe we should say, these stats make it necessary or urgent to confront social media and phone usage.
Social Media Design: You (Almost) Can’t Win
On average, people pick up their phones 58 times per day with sessions lasting varying amounts of time. This clearly points to a habit we have with the physical hardware, but it also points to the hold the software on these devices has on our attention.
We now know this is all by design.
Application designers from Silicon Valley seemed to tell all in the docu-drama The Social Dilemma. The documentary included ex-social media executives and algorithm developers sharing confessionals regarding their concerns over the addictive designs of social media platforms.
Let’s face it, we can’t win. These apps are designed to take up as much of our conscious and subconscious attention as possible. The goal is to monetize your attention. We are the product when it comes to these ‘free’ apps.
Of course, there are ways to set boundaries. You can set timers that kick you off after a certain time. You can only use the web browser versions of the apps to decrease usage, and you can even switch your phone to grayscale to make the tantalizing color less attractive.
Tips for a Social Media Detox
Honestly, the hardest part of a social media detox only takes about 3 days to get over. By the fourth day, it is a lot easier not to think about your phone as much and you’ll likely notice those background thoughts about your favorite social media platform fading away.
I define a social media detox as getting off of YouTube, Instagram, and Facebook. Pinterest is a creative and inspirational space that I rarely spend too much time on, so she stays. I also allow myself to continue to listen to podcasts, as podcasts are easy things to listen to while on a walk or commuting. I never got on TikTok, so that’s not a factor.
Here are a few tried and true tips for successfully completing a social media detox:
- Delete all apps from your phone (obviously)
- Stick it out for 3 days to get over most of the dopamine addiction
- Turn your phone on grayscale mode to make your phone black and white (trust me, you’ll be way less interested after this)
- Schedule set times in the morning or evenings for reflection and journaling
- Replace your addiction to shallow fleeting connections with meaningful one-on-one connections
- Or not, you can just let everything fall to the side until you feel yourself not caring too much and reaching a sense of personal calm
- Buy a book or download one for free from the app Libby to read
- Spend more time exercising and/or walking
- Spend intentional time seeking God, praying, and just being
This is not my first social media detox. This time around I leaned into caring less and truly withdrawing. I wasn’t so much trying to get ahead on personal projects as I was trying to spend intentional time being aware of God and focusing inward.
Now for a few personal notes following my social media detox.
Things Are Simpler with Less Noise
First, let’s state the obvious.
Life is much more simple in the absence of 100s or more lives filtering through your feed on a daily, let’s be honest, hourly, basis. Whether friends, family, or content creators, social media opens the door for all sorts of people to waltz into your life and have an impact. And spoiler alert, despite the amusement, humor, and feelings of connection, the impact is shallow at best and almost always fleeting.
We’ve all heard that we were not made to see the lives of that many people. That much exposure to others can lend itself to anxiety and overwhelm. The bottom line, the things you consume impact you. Trading a myriad of shallow social media impressions for fewer in-person interactions is a simpler existence that takes a little more work, but is more fulfilling.
Things Are Not As They Once Were
One of the hard parts about being human (among many) is the status quo doesn’t just maintain itself. Things are either progressing or regressing.
This is such an easy truth to know, but a hard one to act on. Developing a keen awareness of how things are changing around us takes time, attention, and action. You can apply the phrase ‘things are not as they once were’ to most things: romantic relationships, friendships, attitudes, personalities, health and wellness, spiritual well-being. These things undergo micro changes on a daily and weekly basis and we’ll miss them if we’re not careful.
It’s important to be aware enough to notice what’s happening in front of you. During a social media detox, I find it easier to pay attention to these natural progressions and regressions. I notice more about myself, the people around me, and life in general.
Looking Forward to the Newness Ahead
A social media detox is a time for caring less about all the little goings-on that don’t really apply or matter to your life. Enjoy the silence sans all the updates and ads that would have typically paraded through your brain.
It is a time for considering areas of your life, including thought patterns, people, the future, etc. Spend the extra space and time doing some deep work on yourself and you’ll come out the other side enlightened and inspired to move on to new things.
